Chapter 3: GROW
Lifestyle Optimization
> “This chapter is about aligning your outer world to support growth—using wellness
planning, balanced life domains, and vision clarity. You’ll use techniques that shape your
schedule, choices, and support system.”
Growth is a lifelong journey. A structured approach ensures balance and progress:
1. Community: Surround yourself with supportive groups—family, friends, and spiritual
communities. A social safety net can protect you from challenges that you can't meet
alone and will give you a community that will give you a sense of belonging, purpose and
value.
Exercise: Identify one supportive group you can engage with this week.
2. Healthcare: Take care of your physical and mental health through preventive and
conventional means.
Exercise: Schedule a check-up or prioritize one healthy habit today.
3. Eight Areas of Goal Setting:
For goal setting, we recommend using the w.i.s.h. method. Well formed (positive), independent
(depending only on your actions), small steps, and happiness in progress (celebrate every step)
● Fitness/sleep
● Cleanliness/relationships
● Personal/spiritual development
● Diet/rest and relaxation
Spiritual Health – Develop and maintain spiritual fitness by applying the SIVAC method daily
(Stillness, Identity, Visualization, Action, and Connection).
Exercise: Choose one area to improve this week and set a specific goal.
4. Mindfulness and Mental Skills: Cultivate the habit of being aware of what you see, hear
ECT. Right here, right now to prevent yourself from getting lost in destructive thought patterns.
5. Stillness: If you can observe your thoughts and feelings, that means you are not them.
Find perfect stillness by identifying with the observer, not the thoughts and feelings that arise.
> To make this practical, use the T.O.P. method:
🔹 T.O.P. — Thought, Observe, Pick
When a strong thought or emotion arises—especially one that demands action, like “I want to
quit,” or “I need this now”—don’t react. Instead:
T – Thought:
Name the thought or feeling. Just acknowledge it.
“There’s the craving.” “That’s fear.” “That’s guilt.”
O – Observe:
Take a breath and step back. Remind yourself:
“That’s a thought, not me. I am the one observing this.”
P – Pick:
Make a conscious choice about how to respond.
Choose from your values, your vision, your truth—not your impulse.
This is how you reclaim your power—not by fighting your mind, but by leading it.
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Chapter 4
